


Despite all ( I will forget)

by Rhyswelle



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Feels I guess, Grief/Mourning, Loss, M/M, bless yall iguess, i dont know, i tbh dont kno how to use this, this is for angst week but idk if its angst enough, this is suppose to be sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 13:46:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17326136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhyswelle/pseuds/Rhyswelle
Summary: This time I will slowly forget.a short drable for Banana Fish Angst Week.





	Despite all ( I will forget)

 

On a dewy night of a fine winter season.  A young petite man wearing a beige trench coat and a heavy wool scarf stood by. Trembling slightly he placed a single stem of a  **_purple hyacinth_ ** in front of the tombstone. It’s a bit funny, he never really understand the purpose of the flowers. Sure he gets it, its meant to be given as a gift for someone special but  for what reason? We give something only to die in a few days. Is it for self satisfaction? Simply an act of impulse? He will never understand the purpose even until now. Scoffing silently, the young man scotch down to stare at the engravings written in the tombstone. 

 

_ My beloved, _

_ This might be the last time I will write a letter for you.  _

_ But do not fret, _

_ For this won’t be the last time my heart will hold you.  _

  
  


“Hello, Ash” The Young man murmured with a hint of a Japanese accent. He curled his lips and blinked his eyes trying to was away the unshed tears that are threatening to fall. Even though it was already roughly around 5 years he still can’t forget.  _ He just can’t… _

 

_ From your soft little touches down to your awkward little stances.  _

_ From now onwards I will slowly forget.  _

_ Little by little I will slowly forget.  _

_ From your rough feet,  _

_ Trying to ran away from my tickles.  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

_ From your round about hips,  _

_ Swaying and swaying as we dance under the moonlight  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

 

For someone like Eiji Okumura, It took  big impact in his life. Ash, His annoying smart mouthed Ash, despite the difference he really loved him, despite the challenges he never quit, despite everything he will forever be in Eiji’s heart. But even so, but even so..

“ _ It still hurts”  _ he slurred his words. Eiji, the young man, hastily took out a small box from his pocket. 

“I found it, Ash. After 5 years I finally found it” he said chuckling, as if ‘Ash’ raised his fine eyebrow, Eiji quickly explained. “Apparently, Sing hid it and I just found out about it yesterday. I really thought that along with you this thing also disappeared...I’m glad I found it”  Glancing at the small box, Eji smiled softly. Inside the box is one of the best thing that both Eiji and Ash treasured, despite being small it hold a great sentimental value. Because inside the box was a slightly slender ring that was presented under the light of a full moon. Eiji could still remember how Ash tried to ran away from his hands who is about to tickle him in the cold breeze of the night sea, How they both gaze at the stars while they exchange rings, And how they softly sway and dance in the chilly vast sea. Despite getting a cold the next day it was something Eiji treasured so so much. 

 

_ From you broad shoulders,  _

_ Who despite knowing my weaknesses would always be present when I cry. _

_ This time I will slowly forget.  _

_ From your ‘man’ arms you so proud off,  _

_ Would surely be hold me tight even through the darkest times.  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

_ From your ten callus long fingers,  _

_ That would surely clasp my hands whenever I needed.  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

 

Every single one of those memories with Ash is a treasure. No matter how scary, how annoying, how sweet, how sour those memories were it still holds a value. Because  _ Ash was there.  _ At least in those memories, Ash was still here. Breathing, slowly, hugging him, holding his sweaty hands. Ash was there in his memories. No pain for five years. Just there. 

 

_ He missed him.  _ He really do. It has been 5 years and yet he still miss him. It’s not like he can’t let go. Eiji just won’t let go. Because no matter how annoyingly idiotic he was. Eiji still love Ash. And everyone can see it. And it hurts all of them. 

 

_ From your dry full lips,  _

_ That would scowl whenever you ate something you don’t like. _

_ This time I will forget. _

_ From you amazingly soft blonde hair,  _

_ That would flow like a thousand threads every time a wind flew by.  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

_ From you heavenly angel eyes,  _

_ That will always awe me no matter when or how.  _

_ This time I will forget.  _

 

“Today, I’m going to forget” Eiji started. Fidgeting slightly he smiled a little. 

“ I mean I won’t forget you but..” he added. He stopped heavily breathe and continued.

“ I will forget the feelings I had, I will let go of them, The pain, the sorrow, the tears, the smiles, the happiness I had with you. I will forget.” He curled his lips, eyes slightly redden as if tears were about to fall. 

 

“ This time I will let you go, Ash” 

_ I will not forget you but I will, little by little, forget about the things that holds me and you. _

 

_ To the story of a certain winter,  _

_ To the story of a certain night.  _

_ I will surely forget about it.  _

 

Tears were slowly falling but the eyes were clear. 

 

_ So little by little I will slowly forget.  _

_ To the bus we got off that day, _

 

He slowly took off the slender ring from his finger and trembly put it in the small box together with the other pair ring inside the box. 

 

_ To the colour of our sweater we wore that cold summer of May, _

 

Eiji slowly stood up from his position and gently wipe his teared face. 

 

_ To the words we exchange in the middle of the bay, _

 

He pat his clothes down and looked at the tombstone once more, he took a deep breath and softly exhaled it. He turned around and walk away. 

 

_ I will definitely forget it little by little.  _

 

And once again the wind blew over Eiji’s cheeks as if a kiss was landed there softly. A soft sad chuckle was heard near the tombstone. 

 

**_My soul is always with you._ **

**Author's Note:**

> a/n : so uhm hello! this is my first time posting a fic here in ao3 and its hard idk how to use i only know how to read here not post. and yes this is supposedly for angst week but i don't know how to angst so forgive me. and its a bit rushed bc i made this around 11 pm and i think i am late already but it will be a shame to not post this thing so yea forgive me. im all over the place omg but anyways thank you! for uhhh reading bless u all


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